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Wednesday, 6 April 2016

No Whistle To Put Da :(

The carnival starts once again. That time again when "Indiaaaaaa India!" chants will be replaced by "AaarrrrCeeeeeBeeee" and "Aami Kolkata" and its ilk. That time again when Virat Kohli will stop belonging to us, instead will belong to Bangalore. When a section of the Indians will root for Glenkeerat Singh Maxwell to take Ashwin to the cleaners. Move over Nation vs Nation, it is my city bestest time now! It is time now for IPL!

While the country and the cricket fans across the globe ready up the war paint to support their favorite teams, there is one set of people who are lost. Even before the tournament starts. Not for them is "Ek India Happywala!" Far from it! They are the supporters of one of the most keenly followed teams, CSK. Probably the most vociferous and high decibel set of fans that any IPL team possesses. (Sorry Rajasthan but neither the numbers nor the volume levels of your fans stand a fig of a chance vs those of CSK. Hoot! Hoot!)

For those who came in late, CSK and RR have been banned as per strictures from the Supreme Court Of India for a period of two seasons for indulging in social service activities like betting and spot fixing. Post many a hearing and appeals, the ban stands. If the Rajasthan Royals fans are disappointed, they didn't showcase it much beyond the cursory tweets and Facebook posts. From what I can gather, they seem to have moved on. The CSK fan? Well that needs a paragraph or two. Read on!

No Whistlepodu! No Halla Bol!

Media reports first emerged about a fairly high decibel signature campaign asking the courts to pardon the club "for us fans"! Then a few thousands assembled up at various locations and stadias to accuse BCCI and other "Naarth Indians" of victimizing us knowledgeable folks residing in the south of Vindhyas (Bangalore and Hyderabad are in California. Welcome!) The last and presently ongoing campaign especially on Social Media is #NoCSKNoIPL which is likely to run its course during the course of the forthcoming IPL season and may make its sporadic appearance till and in the next.

Chennai Super Kingskku Signature podu!

There are essentially two types of CSK fans. The first who supported the team in the first place because their favourite cricketer was sporting its colours. Nothing else explains why a Jharkhandi or a Bhaiyya from UP, separated by miles of Indian territory should be supporting the "Madrasis". Such fans of Captain Cool or Sweet Sonu have moved on to support the new franchisees for which the said players have signed up. The other and more passionate set of fans whose umbilical cord is tied to Chennai first and the players next, whose other pastimes include #StopHindiImposition and #BloodyAmits are the ones in a serious dilemma as to what do they do next. It is for these fans my heart bleeds. Bleeds yellow. And it is for these fans I have a few suggestions. First is these fans should boycott the next two IPL seasons. It is an old strategy but still effective. It worked for Mahatma Gandhi, it worked for #BoycottDilwale and #NoDealOnSnapdeal, it can well work for them too. There is however one hitch. Unlike "Indhi filims" Cricket is an all encompassing religion and boycotting it is well neigh impossible.

Bleed purple, fuschia, blue and a little yellow. Sigh!

The other is to attend every match at the stadium, carry huge banners saying #NoCSKNoIPL and #BleddyBCCI and hope you catch the cameras. Effective it may or may not be, expensive it surely will be!

Sweet Sonu is still a Lion!

As a great fan of this brand of masala cricket and as someone who is married to Chennai I propose a way out of this quagmire. (Seri Seri! Coimbatore is not Chennai but #TodayWeAreAllChennaiites suffices!)
Turn the handicap into an asset. Watch every match and without any qualms or pressure. Enjoy the cricket. And troll the fans of every other club! They can't troll you back. Enjoy the ride. Detoxify over the next two seasons and come back strongly to #Whistlepodu in IPL 2018! Hopefully with namma Chennai paiyyan Ashwin as the Thala of the team!

Pudhiya "Thala"imurai???

Aami Kolkata - I am Kolkata
Namma Chennai Paiyyan - Our Chennai lad
Pudhiya Thalaimurai - Next Generation. Thala- Nickname given to CSK Captain 

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