No Whistle To Put Da :(

The carnival starts once again. That time again when "Indiaaaaaa India!" chants will be replaced by "AaarrrrCeeeeeBeeee" and "Aami Kolkata" and its ilk. That time again when Virat Kohli will stop belonging to us, instead will belong to Bangalore. When a section of the Indians will root for Glenkeerat Singh Maxwell to take Ashwin to the cleaners. Move over Nation vs Nation, it is my city bestest time now! It is time now for IPL!

While the country and the cricket fans across the globe ready up the war paint to support their favorite teams, there is one set of people who are lost. Even before the tournament starts. Not for them is "Ek India Happywala!" Far from it! They are the supporters of one of the most keenly followed teams, CSK. Probably the most vociferous and high decibel set of fans that any IPL team possesses. (Sorry Rajasthan but neither the numbers nor the volume levels of your fans stand a fig of a chance vs those of CSK. Hoot! Hoot!)

For those who came in late, CSK and RR have been banned as per strictures from the Supreme Court Of India for a period of two seasons for indulging in social service activities like betting and spot fixing. Post many a hearing and appeals, the ban stands. If the Rajasthan Royals fans are disappointed, they didn't showcase it much beyond the cursory tweets and Facebook posts. From what I can gather, they seem to have moved on. The CSK fan? Well that needs a paragraph or two. Read on!

No Whistlepodu! No Halla Bol!

Media reports first emerged about a fairly high decibel signature campaign asking the courts to pardon the club "for us fans"! Then a few thousands assembled up at various locations and stadias to accuse BCCI and other "Naarth Indians" of victimizing us knowledgeable folks residing in the south of Vindhyas (Bangalore and Hyderabad are in California. Welcome!) The last and presently ongoing campaign especially on Social Media is #NoCSKNoIPL which is likely to run its course during the course of the forthcoming IPL season and may make its sporadic appearance till and in the next.

Chennai Super Kingskku Signature podu!

There are essentially two types of CSK fans. The first who supported the team in the first place because their favourite cricketer was sporting its colours. Nothing else explains why a Jharkhandi or a Bhaiyya from UP, separated by miles of Indian territory should be supporting the "Madrasis". Such fans of Captain Cool or Sweet Sonu have moved on to support the new franchisees for which the said players have signed up. The other and more passionate set of fans whose umbilical cord is tied to Chennai first and the players next, whose other pastimes include #StopHindiImposition and #BloodyAmits are the ones in a serious dilemma as to what do they do next. It is for these fans my heart bleeds. Bleeds yellow. And it is for these fans I have a few suggestions. First is these fans should boycott the next two IPL seasons. It is an old strategy but still effective. It worked for Mahatma Gandhi, it worked for #BoycottDilwale and #NoDealOnSnapdeal, it can well work for them too. There is however one hitch. Unlike "Indhi filims" Cricket is an all encompassing religion and boycotting it is well neigh impossible.

Bleed purple, fuschia, blue and a little yellow. Sigh!

The other is to attend every match at the stadium, carry huge banners saying #NoCSKNoIPL and #BleddyBCCI and hope you catch the cameras. Effective it may or may not be, expensive it surely will be!

Sweet Sonu is still a Lion!

As a great fan of this brand of masala cricket and as someone who is married to Chennai I propose a way out of this quagmire. (Seri Seri! Coimbatore is not Chennai but #TodayWeAreAllChennaiites suffices!)
Turn the handicap into an asset. Watch every match and without any qualms or pressure. Enjoy the cricket. And troll the fans of every other club! They can't troll you back. Enjoy the ride. Detoxify over the next two seasons and come back strongly to #Whistlepodu in IPL 2018! Hopefully with namma Chennai paiyyan Ashwin as the Thala of the team!

Pudhiya "Thala"imurai???

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PS: 

Boycott! Boycott! Strategy explained here in details!

If you feel like #Whistlepodu, click here too!

Glossary:

Aami Kolkata - I am Kolkata

Namma Chennai Paiyyan - Our Chennai lad

Pudhiya Thalaimurai - Next Generation. Thala- Nickname given to CSK Captain 

 

Divine Delight!

I am not a believer in celebrating the various ‘International Day of...’ kind of things. I believe the so called Women’s days, Mother’s days etc are an exercise in futility and go not an inch beyond symbolism or mere lip service. I mean these are people whom we should be celebrating every day and not on days as decided by smart marketing companies out to sell merchandise. I however have decided to make an exception. 30th of March has been added to my calendar as the ‘Must be celebrated day’ list, to be celebrated on a scale that rivals Diwali, New Year, Eid or any such festival which crowd the Indian festival calendar. And why not? After all it is no ordinary a day. It is World Idly Day no less!

Idly! Divine Delight! With Chutney for company.

For the uninitiated Idly is the greatest of creation after the universe. As the food bloggers would lyrically describe “The finest of boiled rice from the farms of Thanjavur, irrigated by the holy Cauvery, mixed with the balanced amount of black lentil, soaked and then ground into batter in the kal ural, fermented overnight and then steam cooked to outshine the brightest and splendorous Pournami Moon!” Simpler folks like me call it Cakes made out of Rice and Lentil batter, steam cooked! But then why should we stop anyone from going orgasmic about this divine delicacy!

My love affair with Idly surprisingly started when I was well into my 2^nd innings. Coming from a Tamil family where the kitchen did not permit chaats as a regular part of the menu, it was Dosai, the crisper, oilier, paper thin and much overrated cousin of Idly which had me bewitched. Suffices to say Dosai was my chaats and junk food rolled into one. It took me a bout of indigestion once I shifted to Bangalore for my dalliance with Idly to begin. “Give him only Idly!” Thus spake the sagely neighbourhood MBBS. Over the next few days, starved as I was to the levels of being suspected of a case of malnutrition, my tryst with Idly, twice a day was the closest a hungry stomach could come to heaven. And it was the start of a romantic journey which will last till my journey to the cremation ground. (Bengalis reading this may replace Idly with Paaruti and Horlicks which is the staple medication prescribed whenever one visited the Doctor with any ailment in Kolkata. Only the prescription and not the delight. Welcome!)

Dosai! Idly's overrated cousin!

Idly as many of you know is served with  sambar and a variety of chutneys. Don’t let anyone fool you. These side dishes are mere substitutes. If at all there was something which was destined to join Idly in a holy and wholesome wedlock, it is Podi. Podi also often referred to as Idly Podi, Molaga Podi and blasphemously as Dosai Molaga Podi, in combo with Idly is what perfection is.  English Medium Types call it Gunpowder. Made for each other. Blending as perfectly as Lord Shiva and Parvati do as in Ardhanarishwaran. The Podi mixed in gingilly oil, applied like a face pack all over the Idly, allowed 30 odd minutes of togetherness so as to enable the spice of the chilly and the strength of the oil to penetrate the very heart of the Idly and then a gentle bite, measured by habit to bisect the Idly right down the middle! Slurrrrrrpppp!

Idly and Podi. Made for each other!

You would have met many a Foodie who would have recommended “The best Idly in the world” restaurants. Foodie doesn’t describe me however I would fail in my devotion to Idly should I not share some of my best stories here. Once on a business trip, horribly late, we drove into Trichy in the wee hours. Famished. With all the restaurants closed, needless to add. As a last resort we drove towards the Trichy Railway station. And what do we see but the ubiquitous kaiyyendhi bhavan that dot the landscape of Tamilnadu. Serving hot steaming Idly. We would not have traded them even for Nectar!

Then there was that instance when while on a road trip, we decided that we will halt for the night at Madurai. A must visit to the Meenakshi Amman Temple in Madurai supposedly being the reason. We halted. We visited the Temple. Then we attained nirvana. Not at the temple as you would have assumed but at the Murugan Idly Kadai whose popularity rivals Meenakshi Amman’s if I am not exaggerating! The one problem with Murugan Idly was that one had to plan expensive and often time consuming pilgrimage if one wanted their blessed Idlys. Till one day they decided that the well might as well walk to the thirsty and opened their branches in Chennai too. Unfortunately they did it around the time I shifted from Chennai to Coimbatore!

Speaking of Coimbatore, don’t let anyone derail you by describing it as the ‘Manchester of South India’ or ‘Gateway to Ooty’ or the ‘Pumpset Capital of India’ or ‘The Land of the MysurPa’. Coimbatore is of course all that but importantly more than just that. When next in the city don’t you dare leave without laying your hand on and treating your taste buds to a cosmic ride with Onion Podi Idly at Anandhas. Especially at their outlet in Brookefield Mall.

The best Idly in the world however is the one which has been christened ‘Khushboo Idly’ by the people who go on to make the family tree of Yours Truly. To stop any wrong notions the name might suggest to your hungry minds, ‘Khushboo Idly’ so named not only due to the fragrance or aroma that the said emanates. But also for combining with its aroma, the right amount of plumpness. Not to forget a softness which makes the Idly melt in your mouth like magic! For those who came in late, this unique nomenclature is a tribute to one of the leading stars of the Tamil Filmdom bearing the same name, Khushboo! As is Khusbhoo, so is Khushboo Idly. Voluptuously plump and as the name suggest aromatic. The family circles however would like to clearly state that none of us have ever had the opportunity to meet Khushboo and hence cannot confirm about her being ‘soft’ like our Idly. However we are convinced enough to believe that someone who is so breathtakingly rotund, fair and lovely and with a name meaning fragrance must be soft too! Add to it we have seen her melt many a heart on the silver screen. As the slogan in the family goes, “It ain’t Idly if it ain’t Khushboo Idly!”    

Khushboo Idly!

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PS: Thanks @sporty_baba for introducing World Idly Day to me!

Glossary:

Chaats : Savouries

Sambar :

Podi/Molaga Podi : Chilly Powder

Ardhanarishwaran : Ardha –Half, Nari – Women, Eshwaran – Male Deity

Kaiyyendi Bhavan : Roadside eatery

Kadai : Shop/Store

MysurPa :

Kal Ural: Grinding Stone

Paaruti :

Purnami : Full Moon

    

Roads, Ruins and Temples!

Temple 1:

It will save you from a lot of boredom and save valuable newsprint should this see the light of the day if I refrain from establishing the ‘atmosphere’ for the story as is the practice. Suffices to say it was only after pressing the ‘book’ button for the tickets up to Mumbai that you realise that the train halts at Pune and you can save about 100 kms of drive and half a day by alighting there instead. Or the friendly Marathi Manoos of Pune have no idea what ‘Very good’ is when they say the road to Shirdi is precisely that. Or the fact that half of India seems to have descended on the temple town the day you are there. Or the fact that after spending the whole night in the queue for attending the Kakada Aarti you are pushed to such a corner in the Samadhi Mandir that watching the rituals on Tata Sky would have been a better option!

Samadhi Mandir, Shirdi

So let me come down to the story right away. After having been a victim of ‘VVIPgiri’ during the Kakada Aarti, self and wife with kids in tow decided to queue up again for darshan in the ‘general’ queue. After spending an hour or so in the line, the queue direction was abruptly changed to the reverse and we found ourselves at the end of the queue. If this was bad what followed was worse. Another hour or so later the same adhoc decision to change the direction of the queue was imposed on us and yet again we ended up in the end of the queue. If you think I spent the next three hours meditating about Saibaba then you have me wrong. After every hour spent on the queue and then jostling among crowd who would have been better off fighting the bulls in a Jallikattu contest and cursing the organizers for their penchant for adhocism, we managed to get near the sanctum sanctorum. As I readied up to catch the glimpse of the deity, out came one more instance of adhocism! Just as I neared the proverbial last mile the security officer turned me and family away, from the general queue to a narrow lane taking me straight to the idol! To a wonderful, peaceful and a long darshan with none between me and Saibaba! Was it destiny that we finally had an unexpectedly great darshan? Or was it divine justice for all the adhocism that we encountered earlier? If it was the latter then I must concede Saibaba would have made a great Twitter troll. Imagine making up with adhocism what was denied to us by adhocism in the first place!

Temple 2:

I once again refrain from wasting your time on creating the ‘atmosphere’ for the story. Suffices to say that if the ‘very good’ roads between Pune and Shirdi were not so ‘very good’, the equally ‘very good’ road between Shirdi and Pandharpur was....well......nonexistant!

Bhu Vaikuntha Pandharpura!

As we alighted from a mini ride in a horse drawn cart at the starting point of the queue for Darshan at the Vitthal/Panduranga Temple, the mind instead of being focused on God was yet again on the adventures of the adhocism that lay ahead. This temple has a unique arrangement called a Pada Darshan wherein every devotee enters the sanctum sanctorum and physically touches the feet of the residing deity. And given the crowd it was quite likely that we would spend the next few years in the queue. As I stood before Vitthala two hours later overwhelmed with devotion, I realised that despite the crowd and the time consuming ritual of touching the feet, the crowd was not only well behaved but the temple authorities had made wonderful arrangements to move the crowd swiftly without appearing to rush either the devotees or themselves! So much so that the multitude in the queue indulged in what Pandharpur is famous for, singing Abhangs and Namasangeertanam! Indeed Bhu Vaikuntha Pandharpura!

Temple (?) 3:

You must indulge me a bit as I lay the ‘atmosphere’ for the story here. Finally I found it. There indeed is a reason for Mumbai to exist. I am sure you will agree with me that you can’t have a city just because Ambanis live in it or Sachin Tendulkar played here or its staple breakfast is Vada Pav! There has to be something more compelling for Mumbai’s existence, and I found it. BY ELEPHANTA! I found it!

A one hour steamer ride on the Arabian Sea takes you to the Elephanta Island also known as the Island of Shiva. The exquisite cave temple dedicated to Lord Shiva, commissioned by the Chalukyan King Pulakesin II around the 7^th Century. Post the mauling the cave temple received in the hands of the Portuguese and subsequently the British, what is left behind still speak volumes of the sheer scale of engineering, the epitome of architecture and art and the unshakable devotion of the Indians of the yore. I will not even try to explain the exquisite carvings based on the various stories of the Shiva Puraan for I know words will fail me. Instead here is a small tour through the Elephanta Cave Temple. Welcome!    

 

Swagatam!

Mahesha - The Trimurthy

Ravana Humbled!

Gangadhara!

The Cosmic Dancer -Nataraja!

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PS: My 10 year old I believe has done a better job of describing the Island of Shiva. Please check out the same here -->  http://bratscorner.blogspot.com/2016/01/the-first-time-i-visited-bombay-i-did.html …

Glossary:

Marathi Manoos : Marathi speaking populace

Kakada Aarti : Early morning Prayers at Shiridi

Samadhi Mandir: Temple where the mortal remains of Saibaba are buried.

Darshan : Sight of the God/Idol

Saibaba:

Jallikattu : Bull fighting sport. Part of Pongal Festival of Tamilnadu

Pada Darshan : Sight of the feet of the Idol

Vitthal/Panduranga:

Abhang/Naamasangeertanam : Devotional Songs dedicated to Lord Vitthala

Bhu Vaikuntha Pandharpur : Heaven on earth, a sobriquet given to Pandharpur

Shiva Puraan : Tales of Lord Shiva

What Delhi should but what Delhi will!

They say in India things don't move till the nth hour is upon us. That too only when pushed to the brink. Take the hastily passed bill on Juvenile Justice. But for the overwhelming public outrage before the release of the Juvenile rapist/murderer in the Jyoti Singh case, the Parliament would have been happily stalled and plodded through the winter session. 

Do it now. NOW!

The other case pushed along because of judicial activism was the rising pollution levels in Delhi. When the push came to shove due to the court's stricture, out came a hastily thought about solution popularly known as the #OddEvenFormula. It meant that the car owners in Delhi would be able to take out their vehicles only on select days depending on the odd or even numbers of their registration. Despite the many exceptions allowed and some stopgap decisions taken to support the formula like keeping all Schools shut during the trial run, the jury is out to evaluate the effect of this attempt. At the time of going to the press, claims and counter claims galore later, the following seems to be emerging as a consensus:

Pollution in Delhi doesn't seems to have reduced by any noticeable levels. There is a fear the prima donna citizens of Delhi might end up buying another car with even/odd number registration to beat the system.There is a more dangerous possibility emerging of people indulging in "jugaad" of a fake number plate.The public transport arrangements in Delhi have been stretched and are threatening to burst at its seams.The positives to emerge out of the trial run have been lesser cars on the roads and thereby far lesser traffic jams on Delhi roads. Violators have contributed handsomely to the Govt kitty vide fines.Despite the doomsday prophecies, Delhiites have been fairly supportive of this idea.

Jugaad!?

What next Delhi? I would suggest to build on the positives that dry run has delivered. While cars on the road alone aren't the reason for Delhi's poisonous air, there is no debate that they too are large contributors to it.
 For a start, I would want Delhi to continue with this arrangement.I would want the Delhi govt. to fast track buying of more buses vide a transparent e-tendering process to augment its fleet and services.I would suggest a subsidy to commercial establishments and educational institutions while procuring buses to transport its employees and students.Continue to encourage public participation by car pooling beyond photo ops.Crack down on violators not only by way of fines but also suspending/revoking driving licenses.Crack down on cabs/taxi/rickshaw services who are indulging in fleecing customers by either refusing rides, overcharging or both. It is going to be a long haul and the Delhi govt will face many a hurdle while trying to doing this. Fortunately the citizens have shown that they would back the initiative implemented with sincerity. Fortunately again for Delhi govt. they wouldn't be facing the ballot box anytime soon.

However I have this strong feeling that the situation might not pan out as I hope it should. Instead I fear this is likely to end in the same kneejerk fashion it started with. Once the data will out that as feared the pollution levels did not listen to the Delhi Govt's dictum and reduce itself to tolerable levels, the plan will be ditched unceremoniously.Committees will be set up to study what else needs to be done to reduce the fuming air quality of Delhi, with no deadlines.While in search of a comprehensive policy to fight pollution, the benefits of the baby steps will be sacrificed at the altar of popular pressure.

OR

Assuming the OddEvenFormula continues beyond the trial period, I expect Delhi Govt to bestow licenses left right and centre for putting more cabs/rickshaws on the roads. How is one passenger in a cab less polluting than the same man in his own car better? Beats me!
Reinforcing the public transport is likely to be reduced to a very public tu-tu-main-main over lack of funds and how the “hostile” federal  govt  is sabotaging the local Delhi Govt. by not footing the bill for buying more buses.
The overstretched Metro Rail network would be accused of deliberately reducing its services to show the Delhi Govt in poor light. 
A well timed strike by the Cabs companies and Rickshawallahs against "police highhandedness" will throw life out of gear.
And all will be back to square one. And the Delhi Govt will move over to the slew of elections that are due this year. Or the next case of intolerance. Or the next case of allegations on the "corruption" in Delhi Hockey or Kabaddi or KhoKho or Stapu or Pitthu Federation or........

Pollution? Modi is responsible!

Or till the next stricture from the courts!

PS: I sincerely pray what happens is what should but I am willing to wager what will happen will happen. Will eat my words if what should happen happens and not what will happen!

  

Glossary:

Jugaad : An Indian slang for innovative ways to beat the system.

tu-tu-main-main : Verbal cockfights over an issue

Boycott! Boycott!

At the time of going to the press, the ongoing debate on Intolerance that has seized India has morphed into a never ending debate on intolerance! What started as a mark of protest by returning awards by eminent men of arts and literature dubbed #AwardWapsi, moved on to celebrities reinforcing the views of rise in intolerance during what I call the seminar season fever which grips the lawns and studios of Lutyen’s Delhi. The last on this has not been heard yet and one wonders what will be the next manner of ‘protest’ against rising intolerance will be, and when, and by whom. This has thus far been the narrative from the blue corner of people christened the #AdarshLiberals. A euphemism for Left Liberal thoughts and ideology which has held centre stage in India ever since.......well forever!

The counter narrative coming from the red corner is the rightwing ideology which has supposedly found a robust voice especially since the swearing in of the Narendra Modi led govt. This set of voices collectively answers to the nomenclature bestowed by the people in the Blue Corner on them, #Bhakts. There are synonyms like #HindutvaBrigade, #Sanghis but by consensus among the keyboard warriors, especially the 140 characters based ones, the first mentioned is the overwhelming winner! The popular mode of counter protest from this corner has been to accuse the Blue Corner or in some cases proving the accusations thrown at them wrong!

Where is the money?

I refrain from taking you through the flashback which started a few months ago which featured among others the rival warriors sparring over Church attacks, Beef Consumption, Bihar Elections, Go to Pakistan, Gau Mata etc which is well known to all of us. Where I would like to take you instead is to the latest salvo fired by the #Bhakts brigade. Loosely called the #Boycott Movement wherein the supporters of the RW has targeted the celebrities who they have a difference of opinion with by.........not buying! Or propagating boycott of products/services endorsed by the people who have supported the #AdarshLiberals point of view. Three such instances which grabbed headlines were the Aamir Khan/Snapdeal, Shah Rukh Khan/Dilwale and Barkha Dutt’s book. People were encouraged to uninstall the App of the online retailer Snapdeal who featured Aamir as their brand ambassador. Online and offline forums campaigns asked people not to see the latest Shah Rukh release Dilwale. Last but not the least, protesters logged on to Amazon where Barkha Dutt’s book was on sale and gave it negative reviews. In short the attempt was made by the protesters to hit where it hurt. The wallet, the bank balance!

Not so "quiet" at the Amazon Forum!

While the jury is still out on the outcome of the boycott but what did raise eyebrows was the cry of bloody murder from the blue corner. The protest was branded not only unfair but also suppression of freedom of expression. The rejoinder took me by surprise to say the least. As long as it was peaceful it was absolutely legitimate on the part of the protesters to give voice to their freedom of expression which the campaign to boycott the above celebrities was. If you think I am being unreasonable in my assessment or I am not being fair in judging the protests, then let take you to our middle school history text book. Does Swadeshi Movement or Dandi March ring any bells? In case you joined in late, the Swadeshi Movement was all about boycotting products made by the British companies at the cost of Indian weavers, artisans and ilk. The Dandi March was against the British monopoly of manufacturing and selling Salt in India. While many a protest/demonstrations led by Mahatma Gandhi targeted the political edifice of the Raj, these two were an example of hitting where it hurt. The Wallet, the bank balance!

Boycott!

Those who quote Mahatma Gandhi at the drop of a hat must learn to ‘tolerate’ when a little bit of ‘Gandhigiri’ is directed back at them!

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PS: While at it protesters, don’t ever ever forget the first lesson in ‘Gandhigiri’, non violence. You lose and you lose my support if you exceed this brief however right you may be!

Glossary: 

Gandhigiri : Popular term for Gandhism triggered by a Bollywood film.